Stress has always been a main component of college days but this semester I’m going through a kind of stress I never experienced before. As a person I take everything very lightly nothing causes me stress even if I have a midterm or a final and I did not study for it will not irritate me because I know I did well through the semester. However, this semester I’ve been working for the first time going to classes as well having assignments and work to do at home. How can a person be “multifunctional”? Not only that, I as well have to spend time with parents, my mother who lives with me and my father who lives 2 hours away. In addition to friends, whom I have to see not only in university but in outings as well. I tried time management however; sleeping more than 4 hours is not an option, so how I live on coffee.
At the same time I’m trying to have time for myself so I dedicated half an hour of reading before sleeping and now I’m reading a book called the Zahir by Paulo cello which is a very interesting book that takes me away for a while but as soon as I close the book and look at the clock I snap back to reality, prepare my clothes for the next day, and sleep. I wake up the next day worrying about every single detail of the day even little things like putting fuel to my car, what coffee flavor will I drink, where I will park at university, where I will park when I go to work, I worry about making it on time to class and on time to work. Moreover, and that what provokes me the most that everything is expecting me to do everything at the same time spend time with my parent, eat, drink, read, work, and study.
This kind of phase I’m going through is one I never experienced before. Every now and then I try to convince myself that this is ok this is normal and I believe that lie for a while but afterwards it does not make sense. I need a break I need some time with myself that I’m not even allowed to have. Everyone is putting more stress on me I don’t even listen to what my friends talk about anymore the things that are bothering them, I became very aggressive and everyone does not know the reason. The reason is the stress phase I’m in. its too much for one person to handle and no one understands. Worries are endless because at that point of life I now think about my masters what do I want in life too much thinking and no major accomplishments. Thus, I have decided that when this semester ends I’ll just take a break from everything and everyone and go to a place called Basata in the red sea where there is no internet connection or a phone signal and relax and think logically about my life about what I want and what goal do I need to achieve.
At the same time I’m trying to have time for myself so I dedicated half an hour of reading before sleeping and now I’m reading a book called the Zahir by Paulo cello which is a very interesting book that takes me away for a while but as soon as I close the book and look at the clock I snap back to reality, prepare my clothes for the next day, and sleep. I wake up the next day worrying about every single detail of the day even little things like putting fuel to my car, what coffee flavor will I drink, where I will park at university, where I will park when I go to work, I worry about making it on time to class and on time to work. Moreover, and that what provokes me the most that everything is expecting me to do everything at the same time spend time with my parent, eat, drink, read, work, and study.
This kind of phase I’m going through is one I never experienced before. Every now and then I try to convince myself that this is ok this is normal and I believe that lie for a while but afterwards it does not make sense. I need a break I need some time with myself that I’m not even allowed to have. Everyone is putting more stress on me I don’t even listen to what my friends talk about anymore the things that are bothering them, I became very aggressive and everyone does not know the reason. The reason is the stress phase I’m in. its too much for one person to handle and no one understands. Worries are endless because at that point of life I now think about my masters what do I want in life too much thinking and no major accomplishments. Thus, I have decided that when this semester ends I’ll just take a break from everything and everyone and go to a place called Basata in the red sea where there is no internet connection or a phone signal and relax and think logically about my life about what I want and what goal do I need to achieve.
No comments:
Post a Comment